Echo Park
by Henny the Weevil hunter
Summary: The first chapter is awful, but the rest is very good in my opinion. Most of it's written by Hitoki. Something happens to Kazu that seriously messes him up....
1. Horrifying pervertedness: by me

Hello my name is henny! Okay, that worked! Anyway, this is my first fanfic and I'm using it to see how many flames FF.net is capable of producing! I will write good stuff, just tell me if this one is crap, which it is, okay?

This has been edited by Cricket to fit into an 'R' rating!  
  
TITLE- Janyuu's Little Friend  
  
PURPOSE OF FANFIC- Make hitoki hate me  
  
OTHER PURPOSE- Make FF.net hate me

PAIRING IN FANFIC- Rika and Terriermon, KAZU AND JANYUU, Takato's mum and Takato 

RATING: R

I own Digimon! No I don't, but I own this story, and Cricket owns the word shiznit which me and Hitoki steal off her, and biznatch is a word used in many public places, but it aint my word, so nyah.

I AM EVIL!  
  
  
  
One day, after the escapades of the D-Reaper and all that shiznit, Henry Wong invited Takato, Jeri, Kazu, Kenta and Rika to his house. He would invite Suzie but she was his sister and lived in his house. His NAMELESS BROTHER AND SISTER looked around in the house. The boy said that the house sucked and left to become a hobo. The girl hated the house and left to become a prostitute.

Henry got bored waiting for them to come. Terriermon looked at him. "Is Rika coming?"  
  
"yeah."  
  
"Good!" terriermon was in love with Rika, but Henry didn't know that of course. Henry's dad was walking past and he tripped over Terriermon, but payed no attention to him. 

There was a knock at the door. Henry ran to get it. 

"hello?"  
  
It was Takato. Takato was running because he was trying to escape his mother who loved him so much she wanted to rape him. Henry slammed the door behind Takato and takato smiled in gratitude. "Thanks henry. I thought my mom might catch up to me!"

"No problem, Takato!" henry smiled back.

The door was knocked on again. Rika kicked through the door. 

"Hi Rika!" said Takato. 

"Hi Rika!" said henry 

"What did you do to my door rika?" Janyuu yelled. 

"I kicked it!" Rika said, and she started flirting with janyuu, who was around thirty years older than her. "I'm sure I can make up for the door though, sir."  
  
Janyuu liked Rika's arse, but her hair was pineapple-shaped and so she lost her appeal. He kicked her and waited near the door for a good-looking person to walk through the gap where the door was 

Then Kazu and Kenta walked through the door!  
  
"Hi Kazu! Hi Kenta!" takato said. 

"Hi Kazu, hi Kenta!" Henry said.

"Hi Stupid, Hi Stupid," said Rika the stupid girl

janyuu said nothing but just looked at both boys' behinds. Kenta was disappointing, but kazu- kazu was better than Rika! And he had a better haircut, too. 

Jeri came in and exploded. No more jeri! She died like Leomon. HAAAA!

Terriermon came out from behind a corner, running away from Suzie. Rika saw Suzie threatening Terriermon and shot her. Henry beat Rika up for killing his sister then went into his room with Takato. 

Then Rika went into a closet with Terriermon. 

This left janyuu, Kenta and kazu in the hall. Kenta wasn't stupid- he could tell that Janyuu's bespectacled eyes were fixed on his best friend, and crush's pants. As he opened his mouth to say something that might take him and Kazu away from Janyuu- "Kenta, do you want to go into Henry's room with the others?"

Kenta's glasses smacked against the floor as he looked at henry's father. "Wha-?"

Janyuu nudged Kenta into the room and slammed the door. 

Kazu had ignored this because he was looking at the wall. He noticed all right when Janyuu grabbed hold of him, gagged him and pulled him into his bedroom, then locked the door. Luckily Mrs Wong wasn't in.

Janyuu threw Kazu on the bed and the brunette glared angrily up at him. Janyuu grinned and shoved his glasses up his nose. "This room's got good soundproofing, so there's no real need for this."  
  
He wrenched the gag out of Kazu's mouth and almost dislocated his jaw in the process. Kazu felt his mouth to check that it was still attached and stood up. "What the fuck are you doing?!"

Janyuu was getting aroused just by looking at the teenager. He grabbed hold of Kazu's shirt and ripped it over his head, much to the protest of kazu, who screamed out, "What the hell is wrong with you?! Mr Wong? Why the hell-"  
  
his talking was stopped when Janyuu smashed his head dard into the bedpost and his consciousness almost gave way. Janyuu ripped off Kazu's pants and flipped him over, and he violated him form behind. Kazu's body went limp on the bed.

"Nrrrn." He mumbled into the bed. 

He was in a very painful position, because as janyuu still hadn't taken the visor off of him, it was against the bed and digging into his head. Janyuu ignored this, but ended up flipping him over again anyway so that he could get at his crotch.

Kazu blinked at him, suddenly afraid. Very afraid.

"Good God."

The poor boy ended up screaming as if his life depended on it all the way through the night.

The next morning, Rika and Terriermon fell out of the closet and found that henry's paretns' room was locked. Terriermon slammed into it some time and the door opened. Henry's father was asleep on top of kazu. 

And they weren't wearing clothing.

Rika screamed. Everyone in the house woke. Kenta ran into the room and his heart broke when he realized his best friend and crush was in a relationship with an older man. 

THE END 

Ha! You shall suffer my insanity and pointless pervertedness! HAAAAA!


	2. The story gets better as Kazu gets worse...

Hello, it's me again!  
Hitoki + Cricket: (throw rotten fruit at Henny)

Now, I split my sides laughing at these flames I got…. HA HA HA HA HA YOU BOTHERED TO REVIEW THIS PIECA CRAP YOU LOSERS!

Ri-te-ho then… 

Hitoki was kind and gracious enough to write a FULL second chapter for this story. It's better.

Hitoki: I only wrote it for the Foghorn single. And a Just A Day single…. That's why I did it. I feel so ashamed (cries) I had to listen to Just A Day just to drive myself to write this….  
Cricket: (pats Hitoki on the shoulder) there there.

By the way, she took this oppurtunity to change it into a HIROTA (shudders)

-

Kazu's POV. 

-

Oh my God.

Did that just happen?

Ah, shit…. It did.

Oh my God, oh my god…

A scream Someone just screamed. And there's crying. I'd sit up and have a look if whatever it was holding me down-

OH MY GOD!

I've just whimpered. Gasps from the doorway. Janyuu rolls off. He's still asleep. 

"Oh my God…" _I'm_ crying now. I've finally said those three words that sum up this situation. Why the fuck did God let that happen anyway?

"Kazu, Kazu, Kazu…." Kenta. He's ran up to me now and he's got his arms around me. That's kinda embarassing when you're not wearing anything. I groaned as he touched my ribs.   
"Rika!" He yelled towards the door. "Go ring Kazu's mum!"

There was a 'Got it' from outside, and the receding sound of footsteps. I'd stopped crying, but my face was still damp. "Kent-a?"  
"What, Kazu?" he looks a little bit like a nervous bunny-rabbit, with his eyes behind those glasses and his nose twitching. 

I groaned a bit as I tried to get up. Something had me stuck on the bed. "Get me off this fucking bed, out of this fucking room, and tell me that whatever just FUCKING happened DIDN'T FUCKING HAPPEN!" 

Swearing eased the sharp little pain in my chest.

There was the little bunny look again. Kenta grabbed hold of my hand and started working away a the binds. "I can do those first two things, Kazu," he murmured shakily.

"Please, Kenta…." I'm crying again. Shit. 

I'm off of the bed now. Kenta digs around and finds my clothes in a little heap by the bed. I wriggle into them gratefully and get out of there as fast as I can. My arse is KILLING ME. 

"Oh Kazu…." Kenta's arms are back round my waist. He's crying again, the tears soaking through my T-shirt and being absorbed by my skin. They were lovely and warm. I found myself hugging him back. "I'm so sorry."

I nuzzled into the top of his head. I didn't want him to see the way I was blushing. My own tears mingled into his hair.

Rika walked up to me, shaking her head. "I phoned your parents and asked them to pick you up because you were feeling ill. I couldn't say what happened on the phone."

I smiled weakly at her and nodded. She put her hand on my shoulder, her elbow resting just above Kenta's head. "You've got some resistance to act this normal after that, kiddo."  
I cocked my head on one side. "Hm. I'll take that as a compliment."  
She smiled and looked to the bedroom. "Takato and Henry are still asleep."

I shrugged. She went into the bedroom and left me and Kenta in the hall.

There was a knock at the door. Kenta detached himself from me and ran to the door, me in hot pursuit. My mum flung herself on top of me. "Are you okay, Kazu?! Please tell me you're okay! Have you thrown up? What do you feel like?"

"I'm fine." I grumbled, though I felt like I'd crumbled away inside and was just empty.   
The door at the end of the hall opened and Janyuu walked out, grinning. "Well, hi there, Mrs Shiota-"

"Mum. Let's go. NOW."

I have this sort of relationship with my mum- I say something and she does it. I had a very nice upbringing from her. My dad realized how obnoxious I was turning out to be and had to whack me a few times. Hey, I get used to it.

I don't think I'll get used to Janyuu. We're out of the house and wlaking back home sharpish.

-

Kenta POV

-

My hand hovered above the phone. Kazu might not want to talk. I don't know exactly what happened with Janyuu, but I know that it had something to do with sex. And sex isn't an easy subject to talk about. 

I decided to ring him up and talk to him normally. It might help him out a bit.

Ring, ring…

"Hiya." Well. That wasn't Kazu-like. If it were Kazu-like, that would have an exclamation mark after it, and would be followed by an endless jumble of words randomly punctuated by 'Chumley'. 

"Hi, Kazu." I sat down with the phone. "Are you okay?"  
"Just a sec." There was the sound of a door slamming and locking.

"KAZU! DON'T SLAM THE DOOR!"  
"FUCK OFF, DAD!"

"KAZU!"

He was back on- I could hear him breathing down the end of the phone. "Sorry about that."

"Um, no problem."

"Look, I'm sorry about screwing your life up because of-"  
"Kazu, it wasn't you, it was Janyuu! Now shut up, stop thinking those stupid things about you being responsible, and don't slam the door, it's rude."

Kazu laughed. It didn't sound right- it sounded hollow and empty, as if he was trying to cry but it came out wrong. "Right. Whatever."

"Kazu…..are you allowed out?"  
He stopped for a second. His breathing was harsh andraspy, as if he was choking. "Not yet. Not yet." 

"Why?"  
"I cut myself."  
"Huh?" I blinked, not understanding.

His voice came out, pleased, almost as if he'd made an _achievement_. "All by myself. All by myself. I blame myself. I guess you think it's funny now, eh Kenta? My life sounds like a FUCKING FEEDER SONG!"*

"God, Kazu…" I stopped. He'd maybe lost it. Those sort of things do that to people.

"I cut myself….this big long gash right down my arm…. On purpose. There was so much blood…" He was sobbing. "I was in the shower, and it went all over my legs…. I cut my other arm….. More blood….and I passed out. My mum….she was terrified. I made her feel so bad…"

He was crying for a while. "I'm such a bitch to everyone."

"I love you anyway,"** I said into the phone, and I switched it off. 

Poor Kazu.

I decided to go for a walk to clear my head. I told my mum and dad and left. I ended up walking along the beach.

I love walking along the beach when the sun sets. It was setting now. A beautiful big palette of pinks and purples, oranges and golds.

There was a little figure sitting on the beach where the waves were coming in. that was weird….no one ever comes out recently. The other beach is more open- this one has a natural shelf around it and it's kinda small. I rushed down the steps and gasped.

"Kazu, you're not allowed out!"  
He didn't listen. He just looked at the sea, hugging his knees. A thin mark reached from under his T-shirt, presumably it ended up at his shoulder, but I could see the start…. The white mark stopped at his wrist. A breeze blew past and ruffled at his hair.

"Kazu?"  
"…"

he didn't want to talk. I sat next to him and looked out at the sea too. 

"Why did that have to happen." It wasn't a question. There was no inflection to suggest it was a question. Kazu's voice was just a long, flat, monotone. "Why the hell did it have to be _me_."

"Kazu…."

"Kenta. Why the hell did you say what you did when you turned off the phone?" 

Some expression at least. I thought back to when I was on the phone-

Shit.

"Why….did….you….say…that?" Oh, another emotion. Impatience.

I couldn't say anything. I just watched him. He closed his eyes and rocked backwards and forwards gently, his visor shadowing his eyes a little. "I'm not gay, Kenta."

Whoops. You'd better pay for that broken heart, Kazu.

"The fact that… _that_….happened, does not make me gay." His shirt blew in the wind, rippling fluidly around his skinny body. I don't care if he's not gay. He's _beautiful._

"But that won't stop us being friends, will it?" Wow! That actually sounded almost normal!

"Of course not." I nodded. "But Kazu…please….don't die."  
He took a long time before answering. His eyes were still blue, but they'd changed- instead of being that sharp, instantly noticeable cobalt, they'd changed to a sort of grey-blue, and there was no light left in them at all. He stared blankly into the sea, watching silently as sunrays bounced on the tide. "I'm already dead."

-

Will be continued.

Hitoki: WHAT?!

You've won the Foghorn and Just A day singles…. But what would you do for…. Emily and all three Nothing singles?

Hitoki: (grumbles)

Cricket: Bribing evil…

Henny: I actually like this story now…. 

Hitoki: that's because I'm writing it for you.

Henny: yeah, whatever. I'm amazed how serious you made that after how awful the first chapter was…

Cricket: Don't remind us.

Hitoki:

* Okay, I'm sorry. I _was_ listening to Feeder's Just A Day…. 

** "You're a bitch, but I love you anyway," is a line out of the Bitch Song by Bowling For Soup.


	3. Maybe Hirotaka

Henny: And we're back!  
Hitoki: It's the amazing, perverted, yaoi-loving, reviewer-repelling JANYUU'S LITTLE FRIEND SHOW!

Hitoki: You do know that your title sucks. You should have got Crik-ee to give you one. She's poetic and junk. She came up with half of mine.

Henny: Yes, but I am ORIGINAL *_*

Hitoki: ¬¬ Yeah. Sure. And I'm SURE I _didn't_ just write a FULL last chapter for you, and I'll end up doing it again

Henny: Then come up with a better title.

Hitoki: no problem. As I plan on more Just A Day references you should call it Just A Day.

Henny:……OK. As you're writing it. Right?

Hitoki: Depends.

Henny: The Nothing single's a promo.

Hitoki: Then I'm not doing it.

Henny: It's signed. By all of the band.

Hitoki: (teleports to keyboard and starts stabbing at the keys)

-

Kenta POV

-

I'll kill Janyuu. I will.

Ha, that's a big joke. Me? Weedy, pathetic little Kenta? But I'll do it. I'll kill him for whatever the hell he's done to screw up Kazu's mind. After he told me that he'd died- what did he mean?- he just say there, crying. He didn't make any noise. These silent streams of tears started flowing down from his eyes. I hugged him around the shoulders and told him it'd be okay- yeah, whatever- and I left him alone.

I was scared. Kazu tried to kill himself. WHY? I really didn't like that conversation I had on the phone. He sounded like that thing in the Hobbit…Gollum, was it? Always talking in riddles and nonsense. 

What was it he said? His life sounded like a Feeder song. I puzzled over that while going to my room. There was a pile of CDs in the corner that Kazu gave me. I like classical music, but Kazu didn't get it into his head. He bought me rock music year after year for my birthdays and Christmases. I couldn't bring myself to throw them away, so they sat in a corner collecting dust.

I dug into the heap and finally found two Feeder CDs. I checked through them quickly, then found the song with the lyrics that Kazu quoted over the phone.

Just A Day. It seemed a harmless enough title. I listened to the song. Then I replayed it. I don't like rock music, I already said that- but this song appealed to me. I found myself lip-synching by the third time. 

__

All by myself

Well, Kazu was on his own for the most part…. He was an only child and all.

__

Cause I don't wanna take you down, hold you down- cause you're my friend

I recognised the meaning for that. Kazu had to do it on his own because he cared to much about the others, including me- he wanted to go down his downward spiral on his own…. So that's why he wasn't being so friendly.

__

I blame myself

That sounded familiar. He refused to shirk the blame onto Janyuu, even when it was Janyuu's fault. Why?  
_I guess you think its funny now, funny now_

Well… Kazu did always feel like people were laughing at him whenever he screwed up. It was the main reason he acted like a jerk to everyone.

I dangled my legs over the bed, the song still playing in the background. I love that song. It reminded me of Kazu.

I _had_ to see if he was okay. I dialled his number and waited. It eventually stopped ringing, and I could hear noises in the background. 

The phone must have fell off of the stand. I was about to hang up when I heard the shouting in the background.

"STOP IT!"

"You're a useless little swine, you understand?! Come back here, you stupid boy!"  
"Please, honey, let's talk this over-"  
"FUCK OFF DAD! LEAVE ME ALONE!"

"It's no wonder you're so depressed! You're useless, hear me? USELESS!"

"Please, dear, just calm down-"

"You're FUCKING DRUNK! Leave me ALONE!"

Slam.

"I'LL TEACH YOU TO TALK TO ME LIKE THAT!"

"Noooo!"

"GET OFF ME!" 

There was screaming. Kazu's mum was screaming. Then she was crying. Then the conversation continued-

"You are a USELESS LITTLE TWERP! YOU HEAR ME, HIROKAZU?!"

"Please, just STOP IT! Both of you!"

"SAY IT!"

"I'm a useless little …"

"FINISH IT!"

"I'm a useless little twerp. You satisfied now?"

CRACK. WHAM. SLAM. Scream. Crying.

"What did you do to him?!"  
"I'm leaving. Get the stupid sod cleaned up by the time I get back."  
Doorslam.

I stopped, shocked. That _can't_ have been Kazu's dad. I know Kazu got on his dad's nerves a little, but he wouldn't purposely injure him, would he? I slammed the reciever down. I couldn't think any more. It hurt to think.

I just lay on the bed in the foetal position, letting the song in the background lull me to sleep.

-

Kazu POV

-

My head hurts. Am I dead?  
I feel weird… like I'm floating. But it hurts. I think I _am_ dead.

Yes!

I made it! Finally! No…. No… It hurts too much. Surely when you die it can't hurt too much, right?

Oh no…. I'm not dead. I'm aware of myself now. My eye hurts. My arm hurts. Oh, please, why didn't I die?

"Mama….?"  
"Kazu!" My poor Mum. She's hugging me just like Kenta did after Janyuu…

Why do men like to hurt me so much?

"Mama….Why didn't I die?"

She shakes her head. "You're not allowed to die, Kazu. I forbid it. If you leave me all alone…"

She starts sobbing again. I make people feel so bad, why won't people just let me die? Then they won't be sad anymore, will they?

I tried to move my arm and I swore. Pain shot like a bullet right up to my shoulder. It was almost as if the scars from where I slashed myself yesterday was guiding the pain. 

I hate myself. I hate me. I hate my stupid body. I hate my even stupider personality. 

"You poor thing, you've broken your arm."

I had to laugh at that. " _I_ broke my arm? I could've sworn that Dad just broke it for me."

"Please, kazu." Even I can see that I'm upsetting her now, so I lay still for a bit while she checks me over. It turns out that I had a black eye, a broken arm, and some sprains along my arm. It felt worse than it actually was.

I had to ask one more thing. "Why does Dad hate me now?"

Mum bit her lip and shook her head. "It's my fault. You know, your dad's…"  
"…a homophobic psycho."  
"Kind of. Well, I told him that when I picked you up from Henry's, this little boy with glasses had his arm around your waist- and he sort of took it the wrong way." She tilted her head. "And he was drunk."

I groaned, and the pain doubled. "I'm not a fucking fag."

"He thinks so."  
"I'm going to kill Kenta." That didn't sound like me. Kenta's my best friend.

"Honey, just calm down. You'll regret what you've said-"

Okay. That was IT.

Up I go. Wobbling a bit, my arm flopping uselessly at my side. Anger starts flowing through my veins, replacing the pain that was there from before- adrenaline starts running high. "You're telling me to CALM DOWN?! Do you know how much I've had to endure in TWO days? I've been abused, been called gay, been insulted, everyone just uses me for their own purpose, and you're telling me TO CALM DOWN?!"

The anger ran dry, and I collapsed onto one of the kitchen stools, erupting into tears.

"Oh, Kazu." Mum's crying too. She puts her arms around me and I put an arm around her, and we end up crying just to each other for hours.

-

Takato POV

-

What's going on?

Now that there's nothing dangerous about, no psycho digimon…unless you count Guilmon… around, I was planning for me and Kenta and Kazu and Henry to just hang out- maybe with Rika, or Ryo if they wanted to. But I rang Kazu's house and there was no answer. Kenta's mum said he was asleep.

I rang up Henry instead, and he agreed to come over. I had the house to myself, which was a major advantage. I rang up Rika and she said she'd come too. Ryo said he was going to an art exhibit. Huh, no accounting for taste.

The second Henry came over he said, rather pointedly, "Normally you have Kazu and Kenta round."

I nodded and said that they wouldn't answer their phones. Henry sat in the front while I stole some of the bread from the store, made turkey sadwhiches and got some lemonade. When I'd finished I had to get another sandwhich and some more lemonade because Rika was at the door. She came in and greeted me by calling me a Goggle-head (cheek) and sat down.

We all started eating and drinking. Suddenly, Rika broke the silence.

"Aren't Kazu and Kenta here?"  
I shook my head. She went a little bit pale. "I hope they're okay."  
"Why?" Curiosity started flickering over Henry's face. I leant in as well, interested.

"Nevermind." She took a bite out of her sandwhich.

While she was eating me and Henry kept on prompting her to say more. Eventually, she slammed down her glass and plate and glared at us.

"Can't a girl eat in peace?!"  
"Tell us what happened," Henry demanded, his arms folded in fornt of him. I nodded. Rika sighed.

"I don't know if Kazu'd be very pleased about telling you what happened."

"C'mon, he's my best friend!" I said, annoyed.

"I thought I was your best friend. And even if you are his best friend, I'm the best friend of his best friend!"

Rika and me blinked at him.

She sighed again. "Fine."  
She glanced at Henry. "Your dad raped him."  
There was a silence for around three minutes.

Then me and Henry burst out laughing. I fell off of the stool and rolled on the floor, Henry was whacking the table with his fist. Rika growled at us.

"This is serious, you guys!"  
"My dad's about FORTY," Henry said loudly. "And Kazu's, what, just turned thirteen?"  
"I know," I agreed. "What'd Janyuu want with _him_? I mean, aside from the age difference, Kazu's the loudest, most abrasive, annoying thing to ever walk this planet."  
"It doesn't change anything," Rika frowned at us. "I saw it. It messed up Kazu a bit."

"…" I paused. "You're serious."  
"OF COURSE I AM!" Rika yelled, losing her temper.

"I'll go ring him up and ask him." Henry stood up. Then he realized the sheer stupidity of the idea and sat back down.

"I'll ring him up. I'm his friend," I said. I walked to the phone and dialled in the number.

Brrinnng….

"Who the hell're you?"  
"Takato Matsuki, sir."

Groan. "You're HIS little _friend_, aren't you? Do you wear glasses?"  
"No sir. Goggles."  
"Well then, you can talk to him. If he'll let you."

There was a silence, then shallow breathing down the end of the phone. I could hear rock music playing in the background.

"Hey Kazu."  
"Hi Takato."  
"You okay? I couldn't get through to you before."

There was a stop in the breathing, as if he was taken aback. "How… I mean… we went shopping."  
"Right." I rolled my eyes. Why are all of my friends such awful liars? "Rika said… that something happened to you."  
There was a little laugh on the other end. "As in what? Do you mean the fact I got screwed by someone's dad, or that some people think I'm gay, or the fact that my dad just beat the crap out of me?"  
"Stop swearing, Kazu." This seemed scary now. Rika was right. It happened. "Kazu, come round."

"No." he sounded a little scared now. 

"Please?"  
Silence. "For how long?"

"A few minutes."

"…Okay."

The phone clicked softly when the line freed. I turned to face the others. "He's coming over. He said….he said it happened."

"Hate to say I told you so," Rika murmured under her breath.

"That's jut not right," Henry said quietly. It sounded as if he was being strangled. "My dad wouldn't… He'd never…"

We sat in silence again, until the doorbell rang. I raced to get it.

"Oh my GOD, Kazu!"

He blinked at me. "That's a nice welcome."  
His eyes had gone dark. I don't know how, but they weren't like they normally were. He had a large purple-blue mark ringing his right eye, and one of his arms was in a sling. He grinned weakly. "I've been in the wars."

"I'll say. Come in." I gestured to the kitchen. He looked around like a frightened animal before slowly inching into the room, and he flinched when he saw Rika and Henry. Especially at Henry.

"Hi Kazu." Rika waved. Henry didn't say anything, he just blinked at him in disbelief.

I shoved him on a chair (carefully) and sat down myself. "What happened?"  
"I don't want to-"  
"Kazu, please."

And so it all came out. About Janyu. About Kenta. About his dad. Rikam Henry and me all just sat there, speechless, after he's finished.

"It's okay." He rested his sling and his free arm on the table. "Feel free to hate me. Half of the world does."

"I don't hate you," I said almost instantly.

"Me neither," agreed Rika.

Henry managed to say, "Me neither," but he still looked a bit shocked. I don't really blame him.

Kazu shook his head. "Everyone hates me. My dad hates me. My mum hates me. Kenta probably hates me. I make everyone cry and act angry. I wish I were dead." He said all of that flatly. I couldn't help it. I reached out and clutched him by the shoulders.

"Kazu. Look at me."

He flinched and looked up. 

"I….do….not….hate you." I said it slowly. A little bit of the light from his old self came back into his eyes. Rika nodded and walked around the table to pat him on the back. Henry managed to smile at him.

"I'll always be your friend, okay, Kazu?" I kept the eye contact perfectly. He nodded.

"Will Kenta?"  
"Yup." Rika fielded that one for me. "Kenta's your little fanboy. It'd be impossible for him to hate you."

He grinned at her. He smiled at everyone. "Thanks, guys."

I truly believed that the problem was solved then.

But then it got a LOT more complicated.

-

Henny: Will be continued… (waves 'A' tickets in the air)  
Hitoki: (growls)


	4. Piece by Piece suicide

JANYUU'S LITTLE FRIEND HAS BEEN RENAMED BY HITOKI!

And because of the 'A' tickets and the signed Nothing single she has received(PLUS Foghorn on vinyl and Just A Day…)she's decided to finish it-

1)Because of those AMAZING rewards (Hitoki: Even though the Foghorn single didn't exist as it was bid for it on e-bay and LOST!)

2)Cause she has writers block on all other subjects and wants to write this one. Yes, even though no reviews are coming in.

-

Takato POV

-

"I should try and call Kenta again," I said thoughtfully. "He wouldn't want to miss out on this."  
"I think I should go home," murmured Henry, looking a little green, his eyes focused on Kazu. Good God. I felt so sorry for Henry- having to face the fact that your _own_ dad did something like…that…

"I need to go pretty soon too," Rika looked at her watch. "I said I'd meet up with Ryo so we can go audition for a play together."  
A play?!

No accounting for taste, no accounting for taste…

"Yeah, sure." Kazu murmured, leaning his head against the worktop.

I shrugged. "Okay." I made my way towards the telephone and dialled.

-

Kenta POV

-

The phone ringing in the hall woke me up. I shut off the CD player and walked out to get the call.

It was Takato.

"Hi Kenta!"  
"Hi."  
"You want to come around? Me and Kazu're here. Henry and Rika have to go, but we'll still be around."  
I paused. I wasn't sure if Kazu wanted to see me again- and now I felt embarrassed after overhearing that conversation on the phone- what if kazu hadn't wanted me to hear it? But still…"Yeah, okay."

I shoved my glasses on and left the house. It only took a while. 

I opened the door and walked in. "?" the door was open? Ah well. I walked in, and squeaked.

Oh dear Lord.

-

Kazu POV

5 mins before Kenta coming around

-

I watched Takato as he came back from the phone. "I'm scared about what he'll say. I wouldn't like it if he started thinking I was weak or something."

Takato laughed. "That sounded like the Kazu that strikes irritation into our hearts."  
"Why thank you." I bowed using my free hand.

He paused, his eyes fixed on me. "How can you be so normal after…after all of that?"  
"Shiotas are a resilient breed," I shrugged it off. I was lying. It hurt badly….but if I told people that, they'd cry, right? Takato knows me better than that. He saw straight through the downright lie- he just looked at me pityingly.

"Don't look at me like that." I stared determinedly at the table.

Takato sighed. "Why do you have to lie to me, Kazu?"  
"So you won't get upset. And if you got upset you'd hate me for making you be upset. Here." I blindly yanked a drawer open, grabbed a knife and thrust it into the palm of his hand. "get it over with."  
"Kazu…?"  
"KILL ME, DAMMIT!"

He dropped the knife.

Bastard.

I heard the stool scrape on the floor , and the soft noise of him crossing the side of the table. He gently put his arms around me, tilted up my chin…

And he kissed me.

I didn't even pay attention to the kitchen door slamming.

Then there was a squeal.

-

Kenta POV

-

I stood there, speechless. No way. That wasn't happening, was it?

Takato's arm unwound itself from around Kazu's shoulder and ran tenderly over his hair. From what I could see of his mouth, Kazu was smiling.

"Um."

Takato blinked, Kazu blinked, and they sprang apart instantly. Kazu rubbed at his mouth with his arm, his sling leant on the table. Takato rearranged his goggles carefully and looked like nothing happened.

"Um….hi, guys." I put my hands behind my back. "I'll…just leave now."  
"Don't." Kazu looked at me, then looked at an empty chair. I took the signal and sat down.

Takato looked very interested in the floor. Kazu rolled his eyes at him and looked at me. I can't STAND it when he looks at me like that. He doesn't blink, he just stares at me, and even if I've done nothing wrong he makes me feel guilty.

"Well….um….guys. So….what was that all about?" I managed to ask, even while under the crushing-pressure of Kazu's FEEL-MISERABLE-FOR-ALL-ETERNITY-stare™.

"Um…. We were…just…um.." Takato looked up. "Talking."  
"Yeah. And…" Kazu's eyes slid to the right. "Things just….happened."

Takato flushed red. I blinked and suddenly felt as if my insides had vanished.

"It was your fault." Kazu glared at Takato. "I never did anything."  
Takato looked at him sharply, his ever friendly eyes blazing fire. "You enjoyed it!"  
"No I didn't," Kazu said stubbornly.

"You did!"  
"Didn't."  
"Did!"  
"Didn't."

I rested my arms on the table. "It doesn't matter. I was just surprised, that's all."  
Kazu looked at me, his entire stance changing. He looked guilty. Me and Kazu have this way of looking at each other and not needing to say anything. That look said something like- "Please don't hate me."

I rolled my eyes at him.

Oh my god, I really think that seeing that just scarred my heart permanently. I always thought of Kazu as my Kazu. You always got Kazu with me, and you always got me with Kazu. But he obviously didn't like me as much as he liked Takato…

"Kenta? You okay?" Takato asked gently. Kazu couldn't look at me.

I nodded and smiled. "Yeah."

Oops. Wrong person to fake-smile to. Takato is the only one in all of the tamers who can tell when I lie. He can suss out anyone just like _that_.

"Kenta…" Takato had the sense not to say any more, but he just looked at me. Takato also has this _look_ that pierces right through any armour and attacks at your stomach and heart. I could see what Kazu could see in him, which just made me feel worse.

"I'm fine with it." I tried to make it sound convincing. "Honestly."  
Takato looked at me sharply. I had a feeling we were going to discuss this later.

"I'll leave." Kazu got up.

"Ka-"  
He turned around and gave both of us this glare. Not like 'I'm kidding around' sort of glare. It was the sort of glare someone gives when they're teetering on the edge of deciding to murder you. 

"Can't stay, have a good day, now I've got to go,"* he said in half-rhyme, and then he stormed out. Good God does he need some anger management problems.

"I think I'll-" I stood up, but Takato's hand zoomed out and caught my wrist.   
"You are going to stay here," he said slowly. He sighed. "C'mon, Kenta. What is it?"

I shuffled. "You know about Janyu, right?"  
"I do. I know about his dad, and I know about you."  
I hung my head limply. Takato's tone softened and he patted me on the shoulder.

"I have a huge crush on him, Takato," I said quietly. 

"Me too," he murmured softly, pulling me into a hug. "Me too."

-

Kazu POV

-

__

Nothing.

And nothing's what you got when you ain't got no one, no one… you could have had the lot and if it's over today,

You'll never get that thing you had together, no way.

You only get it once.

Fly away…

If you fly away…

You might die today….if you fly, if you fly…

So true. 

Kenta's never gonna want me back now. Even our friendship seems to have vanished. But it doesn't matter. If we're not friends he won't miss me when I'm gone, right?

__

Shit.

Things are really screwed up right now.

I am NOT gay. I can't be….I've crushed on girls, pretty girls, plain girls, funny girls, sad girls, tomboy girls, girly girls, blonde girls, brunette girls. I've dated even more than I have crushed. So why am I just all of a sudden…..liking what Takato did to me?

I wanted him to do it again. Good lord.

__

What the fuck have I gotten myself into this time?

'…All over LA…..hang with the ladies so they don't think you're gay…'

Goddamn 'A'.

Goddamn fucking Feeder.

I blink up at the ceiling. I love my room. There's posters all over it. System of a Down, Sum 41, 'A', Feeder (with or without John), Queen, Slipknot, Marilyn Manson, No Doubt have their areas on my wall. I have one photo stuck on my ceiling so I can see it when I go to sleep. My mum didn't know why I wanted it there, but she put it there anyway.

It's the photo of when we exited the digital world using Janyuu's ark. Kenta crying, me with my thumb pushing up the peak of my visor, Ryo giving the thumbs up, Suzie waving, Henry smiling with his arms folded, Takato grinning goofily, Rika casually leaning against Renamon, Jeri staring blankly at the camera.

It feels so good to remember good times when no one crushed on anyone (aside from Takato and Jeri of course), we were all friends, we all thought each other was cool. When Kenta was my one-man fan club, and I was just dismissed as the obnoxious one. 

The photograph starts to merge into the ceiling. There's some weird sniffling sound coming from somewhere. 

It's me. 

It feels so weird to cry when you don't feel sad. I stood up and slotted the Echo Park CD.

My life recorded.

While Piece by Piece was playing, I drifted in an out of consciousness, then, half awake, stumbled to the bathroom. Glinting in the corner was the razor. I grinned at it and grabbed hold of the razor by the handle. It was poised at my wrist for about a minute before I plunged it in and raked it down my arm. A fountain of crimson blood raced from my arm into the sink.

Beautiful. That's what it is.

"Sitting on a corner street, children playing at my feet, see the smiles on ice cream faces," I murmured as the wound started its slow journey to heal. I raised my other wrist and the razor glinted again. "Feel myself begin to sink, as the wind blows through my skin, leaves me open to temptation..."   
More blood. I smiled as I buried its head into my skin again. Slash.

"Cause nothing ever lasts forever …."

Twin scars on each hand. The blood loss was already getting to me. I felt giddy. Got to reach the chorus… Got to reach the chorus…  
"We're like flowers."   
Almost there. If I cut myself again I'd die too soon.  
"In…"

The world swerved crazily as my legs gave way beneath me. Blood from my wrists started pooling on the floor.  
"This vase together…You and me, it's pulling me down. Tearing me down, piece by piece…"

I grabbed for the worktop and hauled myself up. Slowly, my grip weakened. I managed to whisper out, even in the depths of death…

"And you can't see, that it's like a disease." 

Thud.

My head slammed against the floor, pain exploded in my forehead and the world crashed and jarred before my eyes as my consciousness died.

"Killing me now, it's so hard to breathe…"

-

TBC.

The lyrics in this do not belong to me… Feeder are an amazing band and I would never try and make any money off of their songs. 

*= "Can't stay, have a good day, now I've got to go!" is a line from Foghorn by the amazing, one and only 'A'. 

The lyrics at the beiginning of Kazu's 'suicide' POV are from Nothing by 'A'. Likewise, 'A's 'Getting Around' lyrics are also in that piece. (Sorry. I do know that I am a fangirl.)


	5. Not Again

Dude.

Hitoki: Jeri didn't really die. Hence her appearance. It just wouldn't go with the story if she happened to randomly explode.

Heh heh heh…

Hitoki: This contains more sexual contact than the last. As a matter of fact, it is VERY NEARLY an NC-17. The only reason it isn't is because no proper intercourse is involved. Non-consensual masturbation is also included. It was all Henny's idea…of course… and henny wrote some of that part…

So what?! I'm perverted! I like the idea of Hirobrat getting tortured! SUE ME!

Both: WOOHOO! OUR FIRST REVIEW!  
Hitoki: Thankyou Thankyou Thankyou Thankyou Thankyou Thankyou Thankyou Thankyou Thankyou Thankyou Thankyou!!!

Henny: Ta for reading past the first chapter. I might get Toki to make it more sensible.

Hitoki: You will not.

FEEDER AND 'A' AND ANY OTHER BAND OR SONG OR THING THAT DOESN'T BELONG TO ME DOES NOT, BELIEVE IT OR NOT, BELONG TO ME. AND DIGIMON DOESN'T EITHER.

-

Takato POV

-

The next day I rang up Kenta and asked him round. This big Kazu problem needed sorting out soon. I rang up Kazu.

There was a long wait until I heard the receiver lift up.

"We can't answer you right now." A male voice boomed out of the phone.  
"Why not?"

"It's my son."

Panic erupted in my chest.

"What happened to him?"

"In the evening, my wife saw him go into the bathroom with his CD player still turned up at a high volume. She turned it down. She passed the bathroom. Kazu was singing. His singing got weaker and weaker, until there was a thunk. He sang one more line and then everything went quiet."  
The fear started rising, making my throat contract and my stomach jolt. "Did she go in?"  
There was a sigh. "She did. Kazu was on the floor. His wrists were bleeding."  
"Oh no…" I murmured.

"You're one of his friends, right? Takato?"  
"Yes sir."  
"Listen here, Takato. Do you know why he might have…done that?"

The fear was suddenly replaced by anger. I slammed the receiver down. What the hell was Kazu's dad playing at? 'Why might he have done that'… pah. How's about because you went and beat him up, how's that for a reason?

I paused. The doorbell rang.

Kenta.

"Hi Takato- what….what's up?"

I told him, and his glasses fell off.

"We have to go see him."

"But Kenta-"  
"I don't care."

I didn't want to argue- I wanted to see Kazu too. We took a bus to the hospital and asked to see him. The receiptionist eyed us warily, shuffling some papers on her desk. "You're family, I suppose?"  
"Yes," I lied. "We're his brothers."  
Kenta blinked at me, but nodded convincingly. No one except me can tell when Kenta lies.

She sighed. "Ward on the second floor, bed sixteen."

We nodded grimly and headed up the flights of stairs.

It was easy to find out which bed was Kazu's, as you could hear rock music playing (quietly) from his cubicle. Kenta grabbed my arm before I went inside.

"Careful… his mum could be…"

Oops, I forgot about that. I carefully looked around the curtain. His mum _was_ there. 

"I'm still going in," I said to Kenta quietly. Before he could protest, I'd swerved the curtain aside and I walked in. Kenta dithered for a second before dashing after me.

"What?" Kazu's mum looked at us, shocked. I hung my head sheepishly at her. Kenta was behind me.

On the other hand, a very happy voice greeted us with-"Hi guys!"

I glanced over to Kazu, who was on the bed. His arms were strapped to the bed and there was a stereo on his bedside cabinet. God knows how he got it in there.

"You seem happy," I murmured.

Kazu's mother blinked at us again, then sighed. "Seeing as you're the first people to make him happy, I'll let you in. For a while."  
"Thanks, ma," Kazu grinned at his mum, then looked at us. "How'd you figure out I was here?"  
Kenta didn't say anything. I did. "Your…dad did."

Kazu frowned. "My dad's a dickhead. He doesn't know anything, you should know that."  
"Ignore him," Kazu's mum said.

Kenta fingered at his glasses unsurely. Kazu's mother noticed him.

"It's you! You're that little kid who…" she broke off.

Then she burst into tears. "If I hadn't seen you with your arm around him, he wouldn't even be here! No wait, it's my fault…if I hadn't told…"

"Mum," Kazu started witheringly, looking at her. "Do you seriously believe I would slit my wrists just because Dad pounded the crap out of me?"

I glared at him. Insensitive git.

"Well….why not?"  
_Shut up_ I prayed. Kenta had his hands over his eyes. _Just please, Kazu, shut up about what happened or…._

"Heh." Kazu rested his head against the pillow. "You don't know anything. Do you know what happened when I went around to Henry's?"  
Kazu's mother shook her head, speechless.

"Okay, here's the deal. Here's the full list of reasons why I tried to die last night. And it isn't the first time, either." Kazu looked with pride at the longest scars on his arms. "One, Henry's dad raped me that night. It killed."  
Kazu's mum let out a strangled gasp. Tears were pricking at her eyes. I stood up, a hand on Kenta's wrist.

"We should go."

"No." Kazu shook his head gently. "Two. My dad beats me up. Three. EVERYONE seems to think I'm fucking gay. Kenta does. My dad does. Takato does. My mum probably does."

"No!"

Kazu flopped onto the bed in exhaustion, worn out from talking. His poor mother had tears flooding her cheeks. I nudged Kenta, he nodded, and we left.

"Oh, God," Kenta murmured softly. 

"I know," I nodded. I felt tears slowly edging out of my own eyes. 

-

A Year Later

-

Janyuu POV

-

The few days after the incident… I spent all my time in the library. I said it was to revise things for work. I was really just contemplating what had happened. I'd actually fallen in love with the kid when I was saving him with the ark. The data for each kid was displayed along with a picture. It was a crush at first sight.

He felt better than he looked. Just tracing the tips of my fingers over his skin was amazing. Even my wife couldn't compare to him. _He_ was amazing…

And now he's marked as mine. I've taken his virginity.

I watched him grow up in the year following. It was such pain to look at him becoming more and more beautiful before my eyes, and yet not be able to touch him. I've never felt this sort of want in years.

Henry became a lot colder to me all of a sudden. One day I let him out to visit Takato and when he came back he refused to talk to me. It didn't matter. I still cared for him, I provided for him. But I _wanted_ Kazu.

His hair's grown. It's become as long as so that he can tie it up. The scars on his arms have healed, leaving thin, willowy marks and his pale skin. I couldn't resist any more.

The urge got so powerful that I decided to go after him again. At night, I'll abduct him for an hour or two from his home… or just get him there and then if he's out of the streets.

You just wait, Hirokazu Shiota.

-

The group walked down the street, laughing and shoving at each other. Jeri leant over, staring in awe at one of the scars on Kazu's arms.

"Let me touch it again."  
"Go on then."  
"It looks so horrible." Henry blinked at it.  
"It looked worse when it was cut."

Jeri shuddered and her hand retracted. Takato folded his arms behind his head. "You guys want to go see a movie on Saturday?"

"Sure," Kazu nodded.

"Definitely," Kenta cleaned at his glasses with his jacket. Jeri smiled her approval, and Henry nodded too. Rika fidgeted.

"I kinda said I'd go to this coffee bar downtown with Ryo…"

A loud 'aaah!' resounded around the group of friends. It had taken no more than a year for the closeness between Ryo and Rika to become a relationship. Rika blushed and growled.

"Any bad comments and I'll call up Renamon!"

Takato shot a side-glance at Kazu, who grinned. The friendship between Kazu and Takato and Kenta had slowly repaired. In a few months, they were better friends than before. As such, both Kenta and Takato had taken to dropping a few hints about their feelings on him. He noticed of course, but as he slowly learned to live with the main trauma, Janyu,( he avoided going to Henry's house no matter what) he dealt with it.

"Aww, here's my house." Jeri sounded disappointed. "See you guys." 

"Bye Jeri!" the others called after her, waving.

Slowly the group got whittled down. Finally, they were all back home.

-

night

-

Kazu sat quietly on his bed, nodding his head slightly to a newly bought Comfort in Sound CD. His mother peeked in.

The poor woman couldn't cope with the problems, so she had claimed for a divorce. Because of Kazu's constant demands that he would **not** live alone with his father, Ms Shiota gained custody of him and they'd moved to a smaller flat, near Takato's bread shop.

"You okay, honey?"

"I'm fine, ma." Kazu leant on the bed, closing his eyes. "Can I go out for a walk?"

"Where?!" Panic filled the mother's eyes. She's grown overprotective of her son and hated him leaving her sight.

"Just to down the beach front. I'll be back in an hour at the most," Kazu looked pleadingly at his mother. She relented.

"Fine…but an hour at the most."  
"Thanks, mum."

The fourteen-year-old grabbed hold of his visor and jacket and quickly slipped both on. Calling his mother a goodbye, he left.

The young boy walked along the beach front, watching the sea. He remembered watching it just over a year ago….and shivered. Kazu walked along the natural shelf and leant over, his entire body relazing as he watched the last rays of the sun die on the water's surface. He smiled.

__

It's beautiful.

-

Janyuu POV

-

__

He's perfect.

I had to do some impressive lying to leave the house, but I made it out. As the sun set I was walking on the beach front, when I saw him.

The breeze flew past and ruffled at his hair. He didn't notice me.

I was wearing a dark coloured jacket and dark clothing, so I hid in the shadows. He started to go down the steps on to the beach and I followed. He was standing by the deserted showers stall, where people swimming in the sea could wash off, and he stood there for a minute. I struck.

I crept behind him and my hand shot out, clamping across his mouth. The poor kid's eyes bulged and he struggled, until I clamped another arm around his chest, choking him. As he lost breath, his body fell limp. I let go and he tried to recover his breath, but before he could I shoved him into a shower stall and locked the door, then tore the lock off. I may be forty three, but I do still have some strength left in me.

"No…no…NO!" He bashed on the stall door desperately. "SOMEONE HELP ME!"

Sensing what he was going to do a split second before he did it, I slammed down the water on the showers, drowning out the sound. He backed into a corner, looking like a frightened rabbit.

"What are you going to do to me?" he squeaked.

I gently closed my left hand on his arm, while the other reached up to stroke his hair. "I want you again."  
"No….please…no." he fell to the floor and hunched up, quaking. He was such a headstrong, outgoing boy at first. I've done a lot to him. "Please…anything but.."

"Clothes off now," I ordered. He whimpered and I slapped him across the face. 

"Please…" tears mingled with the shower water. Slap. He whimpered again and tugged the jacket, shirt and visor off. He hesitated before the rest.

"Do it."  
He wriggled out of his trousers and underwear and desperately tried to hide himself with his hands. 

"But sir-"

He instantly realized his mistake. I was issuing commands. Who gave him commands? A teacher. He thought I was a teacher. Cute.

"Master."  
"What?"

"You will address to me as Master until you leave… and the time you leave depends on how good you are."

Kazu looked uncomfortable, obviously feeling discomfort from being trapped. I never experienced the feeling, but it must be awful. I was about to make it go away. I grabbed hold of him. He started sobbing.
    "Please, Ja-Master, just…let me go home…"
"Not yet." I stroked his hair again. It was wet from the shower, dripping in his hace and forcing him to close his eyes. "You're such a pretty boy….you know that, Kazu?"  
"I'm not gay….I'm…I'm not!"
    "You understand though, don't you? You _are_ a pretty boy… you have nice hair, nice skin, nice eyes. You're a very cute boy."  
"Master-"
"On the floor."
    His screams were music to my ears.
-
    TBC


	6. Yes: It IS Hirotaka

And it's more from echo park.

Huzzah.

Believe it or not, Hitoki does not actually OWN a copy of Echo Park. So I was thinkin'…

I wrote this part in just after she sent it to me and I've forbidden her to look at this chapter. I'm thinking of getting her a present if she finishes this for me, cuz she sort of saved the story and all… so what should I get her?

1)Echo Park

2)Comfort in Sound

3)A few singles? 

I'd get her an 'A' album or a single, but she has every one imaginable. I'm rubbish at making decisions, so someone please help me out. @_@

Here are the notes that me and hitoki worked on together-

Hitoki: Noooo! He's my Hirokazu! (glomp) Could we reach some kind of…compromise?

Ah, be quiet…

I love you Quantum. You have graced the story with two reviews…let us make a shrine in your honour…

Hitoki: ^^

Hitoki: I'm kinda stuck on wether I should make it Hirota or Hirotaka…..

Hitoki: Nay way… here we go.

-

Takato POV

-

When you go out for a walk, you don't expect to see one of your friends on the pavement with his clothes draped over him like a blanket. Take three guesses to which friend it was.

"Kazu!"

I ran over to him and checked for a pulse. He was still alive, but he whimpered as soon as I touched him.

"I don't want to get hurt any more, Taka…"

"I won't let anyone hurt you," I hugged him. "C'mon, you need to get your clothes on. I'll take you back to my house for a while."

Kazu mumbled and wriggled into his shirt and pants, then gingerly got up. I supported him and led him back to the bread shop. I guided him to the bathroom and ran a bath for him.

"You need to get clean, kazu…. You've got blood and…other stuff….all over you, y'know?" I paused. "Would you let me wash you? I'd get it done quicker."  
Kazu gently tilted his head. "…'Kay."

We have a little waterproof CD player in our bathroom. I only have a few CDs, but most of them were in here. There was a soundtrack to one of the Final Fantasy games there. I flicked forward to the bonus track and left it on.

"This is trance, right…?" Kazu listened carefully. "I think I've heard the tune before."  
"I lent Final Fantasy eight to you once, didn't I….? And the ordinary, plain, piano version of this song gets played while the main guy and the main girl are in this airship thingy." I kept on talking to try and take his mind of things.

"Skull and Reservoir?"  
"Squall and Rinoa."

Kazu looked confused, but it was working. For a moment he was diverted. "Was that the one with that really hot hyper brunette girl in it…?"  
The first thing Kazu notices about the games are the women… always… 

"Yes, Kazu- Selphie."  
"I liked the blonde one as well… and the sorceresses." Kazu blushed slightly. He suddenly reached for a towel and scrambled out of the bath.

-

Kazu POV

-

Was there a blonde woman in FF8? There was, wasn't there…Oh thank dear Jon Lee up in heaven…

I didn't mean her. I thought one of the boys in it. The one with spiky hair who seems to be in love with that girl from the library.

…Maybe I _am_…

No.

I….I CAN'T be!  
Fucking hell…I don't want to be gay.

….

I only ever really thought about this seriously once before, and that was when I got my first girlfriend. Laura. At the end of the day, she asked me why I'd spent more time with my friends and other guys than her. I admitted that I would rather spend time with people I've known for a long time, and….they were all boys…- and she called me gay.

I remember feeling empty that night…as if I'd been insulted.

She never SHOUTED it. She never accused me. She just looked a little upset… so I guess she didn't mean to insult me. If it _was_ an insult….I mean…

I'm thinking too much.

"Can I have some clothes?"  
"Sure."

Takato went out of the room. I towelled my hair and sat on the side of the bath with the towel covering my legs. I've always hated my legs. Too skinny. My dad always told me to get my legs in better shape.

My dad's a fucking homophobic wanker.

I waited and eventually Takato came back in with some clothes. I started getting changed into them, hiding behind the towel.

"I rang Kenta up- he really wants to see you, so he'll be over in a little bit."

I nodded mutely. Takato sighed gently and walked over. I felt his hands on my shoulders.

"You aren't Kazu." 

The three words were said so plainly I flinched. He sighed again and gently lifted his hands to cup my face.

"The Kazu _I_ knew wouldn't let big things get him down- he chose to fuss over little things instead. and it got to a point where everyone got annoyed with him. He was pretty much the biggest jerk any of us had ever met, but we all liked him anyway."

He lowered his gaze to the floor. "The Kazu I used to know loved winning. He got annoyed when anyone won over him. But… he had this sort of cute way of recovering from any damage his pride took- and that was one of the real reasons he became a Tamer in the first place."  
Takato sat down on the floor. His eyes were shining. "You…You're quiet, shy, and non-social. You just won't come back from what happened, even though I'm SURE you can if you just _try!_" 

His hands clenched into fists and his head bowed. "I'm sorry…but you _can't_ be him."

I paused.

I slowly stood up.

__

You can if you just TRY!

Try…

"I…." I stopped. Wait. No. I didn't have to think about what I was going to say. "Fuck off."

"Huh?" Takato looked up. Tracks where his tears had been running were glistening on his face. For some reason, a small smile was tugging at the corner of his mouth.

"I _am_ Kazu. And…. And… I'm _not_ going to let my life be ruined because of some FUCKING PERVERTED OLD FAG!"

Takato stood up. The smile on his face grew.

"…Right?"

"Right," he agreed happily, threading his fingers through mine. The doorbell rang. 

"Kenta's here." Takato looked towards the door, detached from me and raced towards the hall.

I felt proud. I know that I'm never ever going to forget those horrible things that happened… but maybe I can live with it. 

Damn fucking right I can.

I picked my visor up from the bathroom shelf, yanked it on my head and followed Takato.

-

Kenta POV

-

"KAAAAAZZZUUUUUU!"

the second he appeared from out of the bathroom I raced down the hall and flung my arms around him. He looked a little bit taken aback, but he looked…happy.

"You're okay….You're okay…. Takato….you made him cheer up, right? Oh thank God…" My glasses had fallen off when I launched myself at kazu, so I picked them off the floor and fitted them on. Takato grinned.

"I'll go make something to eat and drink, okay?"

We ended up all going into the kitchen while Takato busied himself with kitchen utensils and various ingredients. In a matter of minutes he'd heated up some tinned soup, buttered some bread, poured orangeade and we were eating and drinking like a normal group of friends.

Only what happened isn't normal. For some reason, though, kazu for once didn't seem bothered about it. 

"Kazu….you're okay now?"  
"Well….I dunno. It was pretty horrible…" He paused, an unsure expression on his face- then he quickly regained the look he'd had before. "…But I think I'm gonna make it." *

__

I think we're gonna make it.

__

Buck Rogers.

Echo Park

Feeder

Taka, Grant, John.

I'd heard all about Jon Lee. I knew what he did. I knew what Kazu tried to do. I'm so glad he didn't commit suicide…I can't think what it would have been like to lose my best friend.

I still knew what I had promised I would do.

Janyuu had to pay.

"We're ringing emergency."

"What for?" takato looked startled.

"We're reporting Janyuu."

-

Janyuu POV

-

When I got home, Henry was waiting for me. He was barring the way into the rest of the house, a furious look on his face.

"I can't hold it in anymore, Dad," he said weakly. 

"What?"  
"We…We need to talk." He indicated to the living room.

I shrugged following him in. I sat down on the sofa and he edged as far away as me as he can go. This is probably going to lead to the reason behind why he's been so distant.

Henry suddenly looked at me. "You did something to Kazu, dad."  
"What?!" I laughed. "That's ridiculous."  
Kazu must have told. The idiot… He was in for something now. I looked as confused as I could.

Henry shook his head. "Don't try and fool me, dad. You….you raped him! Rika told me.Then Kazu admitted it himself. _Why_? How can I even _live_ now knowing that my dad's a….rapist?!"  
I stopped the pretence. There was no point in lying. Even if I had been telling the truth Henry never backed up if he was 100% sure that he was in the right.And he was this time.

He just looked at me like I was a cockroach. "I really hope I take after Mum." And he stood up to go.

A smile started to grow on my face. "Your mum…..you mean the woman in this house, correct?"

Henry stopped dead in his tracks. He slowly turned around, a look of worry on his face. "What….do you mean? Of course I do…"  
"Your brother and sister don't look like you, do they? They look like your mother. That's because… they were your mother's, and mine, children."

Henry took a step backwards. "…"  
"However, after being with her for some time, I got bored. I went to the library and met a young police officer named Jennifer Procter. She had no friends, so slowly I befriended her… and then I used her. Immediately after that I told her I was married- and she ran off. I never saw her again, but she must have been pregnant. Nine months from then a baby was placed outside the door with a note saying "From Jenny." We took you in…and you _are_ my real son…but my wife is not your real mother."

All the way through me talking Henry was getting paler and paler. As I finished, he shook his head hard. "No!"  
"Yes."  
"I…I'm…." he never finished the sentence. He dashed to his room.

Well, that was him out of the way.

Now to go Kazu-hunting…

-

Takato POV

-

"I'M DIALLING AS FAST AS I CAN!"

9-9-9.

"Emergency?"  
"Police."

"All lines… are engaged."  
9-9-9.

"All lines….are engaged."

9-9-9

"All lines…are engaged."  
9-9-9

"STOP RINGING THIS LINE ALREADY!"  
Kenta pushed me aside. "Let me try."

9-9-9.

"Emergency?"

"Police!"

"PUT THE PHONE DOWN YOU MORON!" Beeeep.

"This woman's getting angrier each time," Kenta murmured, handing it back to me. "And it's getting later by the minute."

"Oh SHIT!" Kazu blinked. "I told my mum I'd be back in an hour since I went out…and that was at seven o clock!"

I looked at my watch. Just turned nine. I lifted the phone off the hook and dialled Kazu's home number.

"Kazu? Is that you? Where ARE you?!" Kazu's mum was sniffling.

"Mrs Shiota, this is Takato- I'm Kazu's friend. You see, he felt a bit sick so he stayed at my place for a while.. He said he'd like to stay overnight, is that okay?"

"He's….really there?" She sniffed again, sounding relieved. I really pity that woman, having Kazu for a kid.

"You want to speak to him?" I held out the phone to Kazu.

"…Hi mum….can I stay at Takato's….at least for a while longer? Right. 'Kay. That's good! See ya!" The phone beeped.

"Kenta, you can stay too if you want… I've got a few sleeping bags and some spare floor mats-"  
"okay…but I should call my mum too- she worries abou tme a bit."

While Kenta was dialling his mum, Kazu pointed to the bathroom. "Can I just say something? In…there? Privacy, y'know."  
"Um…okay." That was weird. I wlaked to the bathroom with Kazu and shut the door.

He stood in the middle of the room for a moment or two, nibbling at the skin of his lip.

"I just wanted to tell ya…um…Thanks, alright? For picking me up, encouraging me, and all that other shit, okay? You're….You're a good friend."  
I smiled. The greatest feeling washed over me like a breath of air, and I held my arms out and hugged him.

-

Kazu POV

-

I've decided.

I can't go on thinking about this anymore.

I know that someone's heart will most probably get broken…. But… Honesty is the best policy, right?

I put my arms around takato too, and he murmured something.

"I know you don't care, Kazu….But I love you."  
There it was.Those three words. Come on Kazu, time to admit.

"I love you, too."

Takato gasped. He looked up at me, blinked, and he looked at me some more. He let his arms drop to the floor, he backed away a little, and then I saw that little light in the pupils of his eyes.

"You really…you don't….You….You do?"  
"Yup." Hey, what else could I say? "I just hope you can help me some more with the whole Janyuu-the-fucking-paedophile thing, though."  
He nodded slowly, taking a step back towards me and encircling me with his arms. "Love's the antidote we need… Love's the antidote we really need."**

__

When you're all by yourself

Standing on the

Edge of the world

Take a look at yourself

Don't fall back in…

I grinned. "I didn't know you listened to Feeder, Taka…-D'you like them?"  
I only realized how it sounded once I'd said it.

Takato smirked. "Yes I do. Jon."

"But Jon killed himself-" I started, and I knew exactly what he was going to reply.  
"Didn't you almost?" Takato shook his head fondly, then draped one of his arms around my neck, pulled me down a little- and he kissed me for the second time.

Only this time, I responded.

"Guys! I called my mum- where are you?"

Takato winced. "You do know…"  
"…That he liked me too?"  
"Yes."

"Fuck."

"Act like nothing's happened."  
"Roger."

We both walked casually out. Kenta narrowed his eyes.

"…" He blinked. "Is anything wrong?"  
We both grinned on cue. "…No."  
"I…" Takato scratched the back of his head. "Kazu was just thanking me for saving his neck."  
I shrugged.

Kenta raised an eyebrow, but didn't pursue the matter. "We really should be getting to bed, you know… It's late."  
Takato and I gave a mumble of agreement. 

"And we'll call the police first thing in the morning," Kenta added.

An even louder mumble of agreement; particularly from me. Takato directed us to his room, we found suitable spots to put down bedding. I fell asleep even without the aid of music in the background- which just happens to be a big achievemnt for me.

……………..

……………

It felt like I'd been asleep two hours when I woke up, hearing a noise from the window. Carefully avoiding Kenta and Takato, I went to the window

A hand smothered my mouth before I could scream.

---

To be Concluded

  



	7. Grant Taka and Jon::: the end

Hellooooo! QWB, you rock. Yes you do. Plus your stories rock too! It's not fair! Why can't I be a good author? 

By the way, does anyone know how old Hitoki is? And how old I am? Here's a clue- we are way too perverted for our age. ^^  
Hitoki: Idiot. But I love you for the Echo Park CD ^^

=)

Hitoki: I've managed to keep my age secret for ages. No one will ever know my age. Plus, when I don't act like my age older people- up to seventeen-year-olds- think I'm cool ^^v Plus, I'll be older on the ninth. You won't.

Ah well. Anyone can have a guess anyway! If you're right, I'll tell you! But if you guess on the ninth of December, you'll have to take the guess you think from this chapter and add a year-

Hitoki: I want to do this story =/

Okee fine.

----

Kazu POV

-

"Don't cry out," Janyuu murmured, "Or I swear I will kill you."

I squeaked when I saw what he was going to kill me with. A gun. Ouch. The second he removed his hand from my mouth, I replied (quietly). 

"Why shouldn't I? If I die, you'll still get put in jail. So I don't care."

I am _such_ a liar. What about Takato? What about Kenta? About Rika, Jeri, Ryo, Suzie- okay, maybe not that far, but I could _tolerate_ Suzie anyway. I did care if I died. But Janyuu wasn't to know that.

"No matter how hard you scream, it won't bring anyone here fast enough to catch me."  
"They'll call the police."

"Oh, for God's sake. I don't care."

I felt something slide down inside my trousers and suddenly this great feeling washed over me. I couldn't fight- because my pathetic body wanted more of the nice feeling. Janyuu laughed. He did it again- and the feeling got better. 

"Uhnn." 

He carried on. His pace increased. It felt like something was rushing to escape from inside me. Then just before it could- he stopped.

"….Please…." I regretted the word as soon as I said it.

"If I carry on, I'll carry on to the maximum- and because you asked…."

It wouldn't be an offense. But I couldn't think straight anymore. I hung my head.

"I want you to."

The feeling was slipping away. Janyuu brought it back again. 

When he'd finished with me….which was a long time… I was left just outside the window. Hating myself because I was too weak to ignore my stupid self. Hurt because I'd been violated _again_. Ashamed because I'd let Takato down.

I couldn't bring myself to get over the windowsill and back into the house- anyway, I doubt I'd have had enough energy- so I stretched the shirt I was wearing so that it covered my legs… and I fell asleep.

-

Takato POV

-

"Kazu?" 

I woke up and I couldn't see him. He probably rolled over out of sight. I looked around carefully, so that I didn't wake up Kenta. He wasn't anywhere. I searched the whole house and the bread store for him. I couldn't find him _anywhere_.

Feeling a little worried, I went back to the room, where Kenta was _still_ sleeping. I wondered if Kazu'd maybe gone for a walk. I looked out of the window…

"Oh good GOD."

I still didn't wake up Kenta. I woke up Kazu, however. He took one look at me- and he started crying. 

"Kazu…come here." I gently caught hold of him under the arms and helped him over the windowsill. He smiled shakily. 

"I need a bath again, Taka. While you were sleeping I looked out- and Janyuu the bastard caught hold of me." He wiped at his streaming eyes.

"He did it again?!" My voice rose. Kenta opened an eye dozily, then sat up.

"What's going on?"

The story was told again. I turned. "What did he _do_?"  
"He didn't do anything." Kazu's voice was shaky. "I…I wanted him to do it. I let him do it to me." 

And he broke down crying again. Kenta shuffled over and gently patted him on the shoulder. I put my arm around him. "It's not your fault, Kazu."  
"It is," he mumbled, trying and failing once again to wipe his eyes with the back of his hand. "He stopped. And I asked him to carry on."  
"Anyone would do it, Kazu. It's just nature. Your body reacts…" I glanced over at Kenta. He was chewing agitatedly at his lip.

"…." Kazu wiped his eyes. "I'm sorry. I couldn't stand up to him."  
Kenta looked at him. "Kazu, you go and have a bath. Takato, you could go and make breakfast if you want… I'm going to try the emergencies."  
I nodded and stood up, grabbing hold of Kazu's arm and tugging him up too. "There are some clothes in the cupboard to the side."  
He nodded and went to the bathroom. I went into the kitchen, with Kenta following.

-

Kenta POV

-

9-9-9.

"Service?"  
"Police."  
"Just a second- I'll put you through."  
I sighed with relief. The next voice was another female.

"What's the problem?"  
"My friend… he was raped. Three times. We tried to report earlier, but the lines were down. And I know who it is, and-"  
"Calm down, son. Who is this person? The victim?"  
"Shiota Hirokazu."

"And the attacker?"  
"Janyuu Wong."

There was a sharp intake of breath on the other side. "…I see."

"Can you send someone to the Wong residence?" I'd just noticed that Takato was watching me intently instead of making breakfast.

"Of course."  
I put the phone down. "They're on their way."

Takato hugged me gratefully. "Thanks, Kenta."  
He's so friendly. I guess if I were Kazu I would go for Takato as well, which just made me feel worse about the whole thing. But I hadn't got time to think about that- there were bigger things to think about.

"Um…are you going to start making that breakfast, Takato?"

-

Janyuu POV

-

I closed the door behind me carefully, not wanting to wake the kids. Then I heard the rustle of cereal packets in the kitchen and realized that they were awake anyway. I sat down in front of the television and I switched it on, lowering the volume. I felt better. I always did whenever I'd been out to see him. I flicked the TV channel over to some music when there was a knock at the door.

"I'll get it," called Henry. I heard him pad along the corridor. I got up to go see who was at the door.

"I'm Officer Procter. I'd like to see your father, please."  
Procter…? Familiar….

The young lady at the door had steely silver eyes and dark brown hair. The expression n her face was very familiar. She looked stubborn. And then it clicked where I'd seen that sort of expression before…

Henry.

"It's you." She said shortly, looking at me like I was some sort of disgusting bug. She looked down at Henry, and she half-smiled. "So this is what he looks like?"

Henry understood. He looked up at her.

When I did a psychology course a while ago, I found out that there's something about children. They can sense whom their mother is, if given the slightest inkling that the woman who lives with them _isn't_ their mother, then they can actually find out who their mother is when they see her. By smell, looks, feel. Henry definitely could recognize her.

"You're my mother, right?" he blinked.

She nodded. "Yes. Unfortunately… you're also _his_ son." She pointed at me. "You, Mr. Wong, have been charged with the sexual assault of a teenage boy. And therefore, I have reason to arrest you."  
"…" I paused. "He wanted it."  
"What?" Officer Procter- Jenny- looked surprised. "No- a friend of his called, and-"  
"…I did actually commit the 'offence'," I said smoothly. "But… He actually asked for me to do it. You can use that phone there."

"…" Jenny walked over to the telephone, and looked in the telephone book. She dialled.

"Hello? Is Shiota Hirokazu there? …Could I have the number, please? No, he's not in trouble… He's just helping enquiries. Yes. Thank you, ma'am." She hung up and dialled a second number.

"Hello. Is Shiota Hirokazu there? Could you get him for me, please? …. Hello. This is Officer Procter here."  
I listened intently. 

"What's going on?" Kazu's voice asked faintly from the end of the phone.

"We're in the process of arresting Mr. Janyuu Wong for child abuse. But he said that you actually asked for him to commit it. Is this true?"  
There was a sob. Then after a few minutes of silence, there was a very faint, "Yes. The last time, I let him do it. Because-"  
"I don't need reasons. The other two times….you didn't ask?"  
"No."  
"Good. Goodbye." She hung up and turned around with a smirk on her face. She took out her badge and held it up. "Mr. Wong, I hereby arrest you for child abuse- please come with me to the car outside."

I glanced at Henry. He was smirking too.

"Goodbye, Dad," he said, folding his arms. He looked up at Jenny. "And goodbye to you too…. Mum."  
Jenny smiled. "I'd ask you to come with me, but you obviously have a mother here… and from that racket down the hall I can judge that you have a nice amount of brothers and sisters. See you, kiddo."

She left with me in tow.

---------------

A month later

-

No POV

-

The sun slowly started to dip into the horizon, as the two boys watched. The sea shone blue, pink and gold, the waves lapping at the beach. The two boys on the beach turned as another boy came down the steps onto the beach.

"Mind if I sit here?"  
"Not at all." Takato smiled, and Kenta sat down. Kazu nodded, his eyes still fixed on the endless stretch of blue in front.

Kenta turned his head and a small smile formed on his face. "You two are cute together."  
"We're not together!" Kazu complained, but he was grinning. He unpluged a CD player that was clinging to his trousers.

"I thought you would be really bothered," Takato admitted. "I'm really sorry."  
Kenta shook his head. "I'm fine with it." He looked over. "I was positive that Kazu wouldn't ever recover from Janyuu, though."  
"I told you," Kazu said slowly, "Shiotas are a resilient breed. My dad in particular. Last week he had a fucking baby. A little girl. He loves her."

Takato gently put his arm around the other boy. Kazu shrugged it off.

"I'm okay with it. I don't give a toss about him any more."

Kenta hugged his knees. "D'you still give a toss about Feeder?"  
"FEEDER!"  
"Oh no, there we go," Takato groaned.

Kenta handed over a 'Just A Day' single. Signed. By…three people. "I went on an auctioning site and found it. Surprisingly, it wasn't that expensive, so I got it."

Kazu gently rested the single case on his knees and he looked at the three signatures. Grant Nicholas, Taka Hirose, and Jon Lee. "….Wow…Thanks Kenta. Thanks a lot!" he gently placed the case behind him and he hugged Kenta with a great deal of force, knocking the smaller boy over.

"Don't knock Grant over, Jon," Takato said, faking annoyance.

"Get him off me, Taka," Kenta pleaded.

Takato tackled Kazu to the side and pinned him to the floor. "I win."

Kenta smiled. He felt his eyes start to water and he quickly scrubbed at them. Kazu noticed.

"Don't cry, Grant." He wriggled free of Takato and hugged his friend around the middle. Kenta scrubbed at his eyes, then started laughing. "Stop calling me Grant, _Jon_."

Kazu grinned. "Do you really reckon I could be a pro drummer someday?" He tapped on the sand with a pair of imaginary drumsticks.

"You could be a pro nutcase," Takato said reasonably. "But we love him anyway, don't we Kenta?"  
"Yep." Kenta poked his friend in the shoulder. Kazu opened the CD player and slotted a CD single into it.

"It's getting late." Takato looked up.

"It's never too late to sing Feeder songs," Kazu retorted, putting the player on the floor, turning up the volume and placing the headphones down. The song started blaring out.

"This one was on the radio last night," Kenta recollected, fiddling with his glasses.

"Yeah. It's the new one, right?" Takato lookd at the CD closely, but it was spinning so fast he couldn't make out the name.

"_Suffered the breaks, you know I still remember it…_

It keeps burning away…

You know that I may take a while

To come back around…"

-

END

-

__

I said that I was okay

It turns out that I lied

My soul died some time ago-

I'm commiting external suicide

It's like a burn within me

My spirit died, dim

But now my body has to die-

So the blade pierces skin

As I bleed I wonder

If maybe I should have tried

But my soul's dead, so I'll commit

External Suicide

It turns out, that if I waited

My soul would have survived

Things would have gotten better

But instead I decided to die

Dying just isn't worth it

Just stick by your friends

If you go through external suicide

Your wounds will never mend

Although, in reality

The truth that I tried to hide

Was that life always gets better-

No need for this suicide

------

Credits

1st chapter::: Henrietta Wong

All other chapters::::: Katherine(ugh) Hitoki Isamu

Ending song (External Suicide)::: Samantha 'Cricket' Lemming

And a big, big thankyou to-

Feeder, 'A', and other bands that give inspiration when in the depths of writer's block

Jon Lee 

Goldfinger- (for cheering me up)

And…

Quantum Weather Butterfly (For being the best reviewer in the universe – you managed to continue to read the story =))

((Offers to QWB's shrine are greatly appreciated. ^_-))


End file.
